Batul writes:

Hello circles and guides!
I need guidance about my current job… I believe you already know everything and so will spare the details :)

The guide responds:

Oh my dearest one, this is not the job for you, and you know it. Your deep frustration with this nonsense that takes place, this political that has nothing to do with who you are and how you be. Ah dearest one, you have one foot in the ancient times and one foot in the modern times. And where are you? But straddling two worlds frustrated with both.

You have so much to give to this world, a beautiful mind and an open heart. But you find yourself stuck. And you even query if it is right for you to speak of your needs of who you be as a person, an entity to give forth so much, to be held back by standards that do not fit.

I would say to you that you should choose to leave this job and find another. But I know you are torn by the needs of motherhood, being a wife and being an individual. How long can you hold our breath before you experience your truth? What is more important, your child? You? Your partner? Parents? Or must you sit and judge these things when you simply want to experience the great creativity you have.

You could teach. Oh, there is so much you could teach. Being that I am of the light and you are in the physical domain, I cannot tell you what direction to take. But I can tell you that what stirs deep within you must be listened to. If you do not listen to that inner teacher that knows what you need and if you deny that, it will become a deep, unresolved tension—eventually causing an ill state of being.

You already feel so exhausted some days—but it is not exhaustion, it is the mind-heart battle that goes on. A battle that you alone know, that no one else around you has any idea of. This competition at work is not right for you. But you must decide my dear. You must decide to speak. I know when you speak you hear nothing but negative back at you. Speak to your father.

Bless you my child.