Anonymous – Dear Guides, I am wondering for insight/advice regarding my feeling state of feeling a huge gap between my reality and my yearnings. I yearn for a home, a family, yet I feel like I am unable to commit to a place and a person. I feel very afraid to stay in the place that I am right now, and so I feel like I am in limbo and unable to make decisions that feel good and inspiring. I feel sad and frustrated by the blocks that I feel, and I am not sure how to dissolve these blocks which feel all to familiar, yet they also confound me. Thank you so much for your illuminated awareness. 

Dear Heart, you are pretty much paralyzed by your indecision to make a choice, to move forward.  You are frightened of making a mistake.  For some reason, you think that you above all beings must never make a wrong move, or do anything that could be the least bit.…I don’t know what you might think it might be.  But you do dance back and forth, but you are not alone, many beings do.  It is the creative side of you.  You have great creative forces and you came to do a certain promise that you are not close to doing yet.

Though you have dabbled with it, bits here and there, but you keep moving away because you fear once you put it out there, there will nothing perfect about it.  I don’t know why exactly you feel that way, but it is so.

You should try to circulate with other beings that are not so analytical and so judgmental.  There are many surrounding you, my dear, that are terribly judgmental.  They seem to see that a person is only worth by what they have achieved, instead of who they be.   So you could choose perhaps to gather with others that are kinder and gentler beings.  And try to be your true self.  Put down all of those expectations of what you should be, or shouldn’t be, or think you are, or what you have achieved and just start just being who you are.

You are a very creative, very beautiful, wonderful being.  You have wonderful ideas of so many different things.   In order to express these you must actually go to certain places away from where you are being right now.  There is too much mundane about you. You need to see that you can dance with all kinds of wonderful ideas and it doesn’t mean that you have to do them, but you can certainly experience them.

It is about experiencing different things.  It is about saying it is too late, and it is not too late and anything is possible if you want it.  But you do need to make some choices to do so.  But first of all, never make a list of who you want in your world.  Certainly just say you want that love and those strong arms to hold you and keep you warm and make a place for your love in your life.  Don’t rule out anyone and just say you need the love.

I am quite amazed at these lists I often see, these beings making. Who on earth could you find to fulfill all of these things?  Many, many beings in your world have all sorts of conditions.  You are all learning and growing.

So many people have this idea of creating their own reality and if they make this list of everything they want in a partner that will help to manifest that for them.

Well, it is true you do create your reality, but that doesn’t mean you are allowed to create it by controlling every being that comes close to you because that isn’t how it works.   For other people, they have their needs too.  The part that you may complete with them, that bit of the promise, might be a small part and if you rule them out because of the color of their hair, or something so silly, it would stop you from completing your promise and keep you in a place of still wondering.

So, we are narrowing the field too much by doing that?

It is fear and trying to control it too much.

That is what you were speaking of with this person who asked the question, is there fear of making decisions.  So many times we all feel paralyzed by that.

How to do it?  Awake in the morning and choose to get up.  Believe it or not, that is a choice.  Even say it out loud “I choose to get up.  I choose to wash my face, I choose to smile at my face in this beautiful mirror even if it has speckles on it, and I choose to drink water.”  Start getting used to the idea of all of the choices you are making even if you are not aware of them.   At the same time you are choosing that, you are choosing to not be happy. So, you have to say until you get used to the idea of being happy and making choices that cause peace and pleasure.

And I want you all to realize too that there is pain in the physical world.  There are times when you will feel great struggle and difficulty.  But you are not alone.  There are beings to help you through these times and it is part of growing and it is something we all have experienced, even those of us that no longer dwell in this dimension.  It is not all about happiness and light.  It is about the wonder of that ability to be present in it.

And sometimes we feel afraid to make a choice because we might make a wrong choice and I know that makes people fearful of moving forward.

Because you live in a time when there are so many books and instructions on how to do everything, good heavens.  Right and wrong, be, do and experience this wonderful path.

I’ve heard you say that there are no wrong choices.

No.   They will only create more growth.  They may be sometimes the long way around (gentle laughter) but you will still come to where you need to be.  Or, in the instance of making that choice, you instantly go “oh that was the wrong choice” then you have grown and I say halleluiah.   Oh, you are all so beautiful.